I went to Wrexham yesterday. It was a nice few hours away from crappy Oswestry. I bought a number of 7" picture discs, of bands from the 1980's. I also spotted two gorgeous Chinese girls, and wanted to ask them out. The trouble with asking somebody out in this day and age is, you never know who's about from your ugly past. It also felt as though I had a glass cage around me. Or that I was totally invisible to everyone else.
Sometimes an Aspie can get very agitated in social surroundings. Maybe that's how I was feeling. I don't want to approach someone, for the fear that they will not understand, what I'm talking about. Some of the people I met in The Social Inclusion And Recovery Service, I no longer chat to. And they don't want to chat with me. I know this, as I once tried to talk with a guy called Peter, and he totally blanked me in the street. It seems to me that these people are not genuine. I also don't think that the service providers, of SIRS are genuine either.
Another occassion I remember very well is, the time I stood up in front of 100 people, and gave a talk. It was as if someone had their hand up my back, twiddling my vocal chords, just like a ventriloquist dummy. So, it wasn't exactly me talking. I was told what to do and say. This is neurotypical people controlling me yet again. What can you expect from a stupid self-centred, and madcap world. Tears For Fears were right, when they wrote that song.
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